Joke # 170 - Newly Married

The newly married husband came home from the office to find his young wife in a flood of tears.

"Darling, whatever is the matter?" he asks.

"Sweetheart," she sobs, "the most terrible thing happened! I cooked my first Beef Bourguignon for you, and I got it out of the oven to season it, and the phone rang. When I came back from answering the phone," she sobbed again, "I found the cat had eaten it!"

"Don't worry, darling." said her husband.

"Don't cry. We can always get a new cat."

Joke # 108 - The Pig with the Wooden Leg

There was a tourist on a farm and he asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg.

The farmer said, "That pig is the bravest pig I ever saw."

"So why does he have a wooden leg?" the tourist asked.

"Well one night our house caught on fire. And he came into our house and he woke us all up."

"So," the tourist asked again, "why does that pig have a wooden leg?"

"Well, a big that brave you can't eat all at once."